Thank you for recognizing this—I didn’t consciously use the pool chemical colors dissipating as imagery for dementia but of course, it’s right there. I love when people recognize things in my writing that I overlook. Thanks so much for your kind words!
>> Not all hurt comes in the form of physical violence.
True. My late father regressed in dementia and became the passive bully of my youth. The verbal jabs, the putdowns, the ways to put the "uppity kid" in my place. Then he hated my wife and me "forever" when we stole his car (actually, Deb just returned his leased vehicle when he lost his license but refused to admit it).
My mother simply forgot who I was.
I don't know what form my dementia will present as, but I am hoping for a nice stage 4 cancer to manifest about the same time. Let my wife and friends remember me as I was, not some stranger with my face.
Beautiful writing and grateful for sharing your choice of kind compassion to your father. My father was in a coma for five months before he died at age 54. We couldn’t have even fragmented conversations. My husband is in the very early stages of memory loss. And it’s good but hard to be the memory keeper. Kinder to go along with the repetition.
You write beautifully. When you take us back to Florida and describe its lushness, the colors, etc., we are with you. We are in your skin, experiencing your experiences. That is something I am trying to learn to do. Congratulations on all your success, the big ones and the little ones, and your generosity in visiting your dad, so far away.
My gosh, you have made my day with this beautiful (lush, colorful) comment. I’m certain you’ve already learned how to write to let others understand your skin. Thanks so much!
Dementia is such a cruel beast, and heartbreaking to witness. Beautiful and sad, Dana. The visuals of your Florida childhood shine through. I had to read this today after hearing you talk about it on TDWS :) It was great! I received my copy of The Quarterly today, which made me smile :))
A beautiful glimpse into the slow disappearing of dementia. Makes me think of memory dissipating like the swirl of color in the pool.
Thank you for recognizing this—I didn’t consciously use the pool chemical colors dissipating as imagery for dementia but of course, it’s right there. I love when people recognize things in my writing that I overlook. Thanks so much for your kind words!
A beautifully structured and well written essay. Thank you!
Thanks so much, Ed!
>> Not all hurt comes in the form of physical violence.
True. My late father regressed in dementia and became the passive bully of my youth. The verbal jabs, the putdowns, the ways to put the "uppity kid" in my place. Then he hated my wife and me "forever" when we stole his car (actually, Deb just returned his leased vehicle when he lost his license but refused to admit it).
My mother simply forgot who I was.
I don't know what form my dementia will present as, but I am hoping for a nice stage 4 cancer to manifest about the same time. Let my wife and friends remember me as I was, not some stranger with my face.
I’m so sorry—it’s all so hard, isn’t it?
Beautiful writing and grateful for sharing your choice of kind compassion to your father. My father was in a coma for five months before he died at age 54. We couldn’t have even fragmented conversations. My husband is in the very early stages of memory loss. And it’s good but hard to be the memory keeper. Kinder to go along with the repetition.
Yes, it really is. Thanks for your kind comment. 💜
Thank you for this beautifully written and compassionate story.
Aww thank you so much, Bruce! 💜
You write beautifully. When you take us back to Florida and describe its lushness, the colors, etc., we are with you. We are in your skin, experiencing your experiences. That is something I am trying to learn to do. Congratulations on all your success, the big ones and the little ones, and your generosity in visiting your dad, so far away.
My gosh, you have made my day with this beautiful (lush, colorful) comment. I’m certain you’ve already learned how to write to let others understand your skin. Thanks so much!
Dementia is such a cruel beast, and heartbreaking to witness. Beautiful and sad, Dana. The visuals of your Florida childhood shine through. I had to read this today after hearing you talk about it on TDWS :) It was great! I received my copy of The Quarterly today, which made me smile :))